Upset, Just a Little

I have been meaning to post something like this for a long time, but someone bought it to my attention today. One thing that really upsets, not just me, but many cancer patients is the person who seems to know the reason you have cancer. You know the "know it all" who has a professional degree in nothing but is the authority on sicknesses. They usually mean well. They think they are helping you, and they know they are right.

I understand the correlation between menopause medication and breast cancer, in some cases, and smoking and lung cancer. There is scientific research that supports those claims. However, there is no conclusive scientific evidence that links anything having to do with diet, lifestyle, environmental factors, and even heredity to Leukemia. However, you run into people who have the key to your sickness. They seem to be blood cancer experts.

Some say, you did not obey your parents so your days are now short, or you did not do God's will. Some may say you were breathing the wrong air. Others will say you did not exercise enough or you ate the wrong foods. Tell that to Lance Armstrong, the one of the many professional athletes who exercised and ate right and still got cancer. Unfortunately, what these lectures from lay persons suggests, is that "IT IS YOUR FAULT THAT YOU ARE SICK." WOW! If you die tomorrow. it is all your fault. That is a terrible thing to say to someone who is suffering.

People who have HIV/AIDS, or Herpes, did something to get their disease. Some may argue that it is not their fault, because they did not know their partner had this disease. To the contrary, people who have blood cancers (leukemia, lymphoma, myeloma) are not better than those who have AIDS, but we did not do anything to bring on this disease. I am sure if it was preventable, many of us would have taken the steps to do so.

Since I have been diagnosed, I have met all types of people. I have met older people, younger people, athletes, health nuts etc, who have or had cancer. Some with blood cancers others with many of the other 200 types of cancer that people get each year.

It is downright offensive and in terrible taste to tell someone, who is fighting for the thing most dear to them -their life- that somehow it is there fault because they ate too much of the wrong food or did not exercise enough. In fac,t it is more offensive because the person may not know that you have a much better diet than most people and you exercised regularly. Who are they to assume that your diet is bad? Besides, there are individuals who have had diets much worse than ours who do not have disease. Why are they not sick? What about a 1 year old leukemia patient? Did they overdose on bad foods? Most young leukemia patients have no evidence of hereditary disease. Someone should write a book on what not to say to cancer patients.

I guess my suggestion to those who feel like they have the answers to the question "how did I get sick?" is to make sure you are a professional and you have done the research to support your claims. I have read many professional journals that explain the causes of many types of cancer. Furthermore, if you have all the answers, save them for when the cancer patient has a full recovery, but don't blame the person for getting this ugly disease while they are struggling for their life!